When someone says to you, "You don't Jack Schitt."

You can now prove them wrong because--you'll know all about Jack Schitt.

Jack Schitt is the only sone of Awe Schitt and Oh Schitt, the fertilizer magnet, who married Oh Schitt, the owner of Kneedeep Inn. Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and they produced six children.

Holy Schitt, their first, passed on shortly after childbirth. Next came twin sons, Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt; two daughters, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt; and another son, Bull Schitt.

Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school dropout. Dip Schitt married Lotta Schitt and they have a son, Chicken Schitt.

Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt married the Happens Brothers. The Schitt-Happens children are Dawg Schitt, Byrd Schitt, and Cowe Schitt.

Bull Schitt just married his second cousin, Pisa Schitt. They await the arrival of Little Schitt.

Now you-all know all about Jack Schitt!!!!

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